Impact on Families of Autistic Children

The impact on families of autistic children can be profound. Learning that a child has a chronic illness or disability can be devastating for many parents, especially those without an extended support system.

Families of autistic children face emotional, social, physical, and financial challenges. While these difficulties may feel insurmountable, most families learn to cope and adjust with time.

Autism is an emotional roller coaster ride that begins before diagnosis and continues throughout life. Parents and other family members of autistic children often feel alone, isolated, and ignored before receiving a diagnosis. Upon learning that their child may be autistic, emotions may fluctuate between the relief of finally knowing what is wrong, to the despair that the child suffers from a disability with no known cure. Following diagnosis, confusion, guilt, anger, depression, and resentment may occur. Anger and guilt can be devastating to marriages and other family relationships if not dealt with promptly. Faced with a lifetime of challenges, family members may become depressed or even suicidal.

The isolation experienced by families of autistic children can be severe. Isolation may occur for a variety of reasons and leave parents lonely and depressed. Many parents have a difficult time socializing with parents of "normal" children, and some may feel they no longer have anything in common with the social circles they were once involved in. As the autistic child grows older, and the difference between him and his peers becomes more obvious, the isolation often becomes extreme. Friendships may dissolve as caretakers abandon hobbies and outside interests.

Anxiety, depression, and exhaustion all take a toll on the physical health of autistic families. Long days of appointments and therapy sessions, repeated calls to the school for meetings and conferences, and a chaotic household can leave parents of autistic children feeling fatigued, stressed out, and irritable. Hectic schedules and unusual meals planned around the child may lead to vitamin and mineral deficiencies, and sleep deprivation may result in difficulty concentrating, memory impairment, and other health complications.

The financial impact on families of autistic children is enormous. Most private health insurance plans do not cover all expenses related to therapy and treatment for autistic children, and the co-pays for office visits and medications often results in huge financial debt.

Moreover, it is often extremely difficult for both parents to continue working full-time, which means a reduction in household income to go along with the increased expenses. Without financial support, many families of autistic children end up in debt, with many losing their homes due to foreclosure or bankruptcy.

Unfortunately, parents sometimes forget the needs of siblings of autistic children. Overworked and overburdened parents may fail to realize that siblings of a child with autism are under a great deal of stress.

Too often, parents neglect even the most basic emotional needs of these children, although this is rarely intentional. Parents may pressure siblings to take on unfair or age-inappropriate responsibilities, and may seemingly be disinterested in their accomplishments. Siblings of autistic children are at greater risk for a number of mental health disorders, including depression, anxiety, and eating disorders, and many suffer from low self-esteem and feelings of guilt, shame, and resentment.

Psychotherapy is a valuable tool for dealing with the emotional impact of autism, and family counseling is helpful for dealing with marital and communication problems. In cases of depression or anxiety, medication is an effective short-term remedy. For many parents and family members, autism support groups can be life saving. Contact with other parents of autistic children eases isolation, improves mood, and increases acceptance and understanding of the disorder. Often, just knowing that others are going through a similar experience can bring much needed relief and help parents cope with the physical and emotional challenges of raising an autistic child.

Parents and family members should seek help and support from every source possible. There is nothing wrong with relying on extended family to babysit, or with accepting donations to help pay for therapy and medical expenses. Parents must remember to take a break and spend some time caring for their own needs. An extra nap, a trip to the salon, or an afternoon at the bookstore can recharge the mind and body and alleviate a considerable amount of accumulated stress. Taking care of yourself, helps make you a better caregiver.

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• Social Skills Activities for Kids with Autism
• Speech Therapy Ideas for Autistic Children
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